Have you recently been through a separation or divorce?
Are you considering getting therapy to make it through this transition in your life?
Do you feel at a loss, or are you having a hard time accepting what happened?
Have your emotions been getting in the way of you moving forward in your life?
Do you find yourself trying to “get out there again”, but aren’t sure if you’re ready?
Maybe you feel okay during your busy day, but you can’t wait to get home to “get it out” when you’re alone.
Maybe you think, “If only I could find a way to fix things, I could get my relationship back”.
Do you wonder if you will ever meet someone for you again?
We wish things could work, but sometimes they don’t. Whether you’re struggling with being able to make it through your days because of unresolved emotions, what you’re feeling is making it difficult to keep focus on your responsibilities or important people in your life, or you’re finding it difficult navigating your way back into the dating scene, getting one-on-one therapy and support can help. We can work through your emotions, or on finding your identity and happiness again. You can move through this difficult time.
Many People Struggle With Loss.
Experiencing sadness, frustration, or not knowing which direction to go can happen in everyday life. Yet, when things are intensified for you, feeling like things will never get better, this can get in the way of your career, daily responsibilities, and other relationships.
Getting divorced in an age where things have since changed, it can make it harder to navigate through all the different dating apps on our phones, or how dating even works anymore—if you’re even ready. Your struggle at the end of a relationship is different from anyone else’s.
Often, your feelings wax and wane. Some days are easier than others. Things you see, places you go, or a song you hear can take you right back. Different things cause your feelings to come flooding back in. Sometimes it doesn’t take anything at all.
There’s no right or wrong way to feel. Moving through feelings of loss is a process, with different emotions and reactions attached to them. You may be realizing, to get to your best self, you need to do something. Counseling can help you validate what you’ve been going through, uncover what’s underneath your pain that’s keeping you there, and find different ways to move forward.
You Can Find Control Over Your Feelings.
Getting therapy after the end of a relationship can help lead you towards experiencing feelings of happiness that you didn’t think you’d find again. Your thoughts and related feelings can be worked on, bringing you peace or resolve. I’ve been there. I understand how an end to a relationship can consume your life, and I am here to help you through.
What Does Divorce Therapy Look Like?
No matter how things unraveled, I provide an open, non-judgmental environment for discussing what’s going on for you. You will be accepted regardless of sexual, gender, cultural or spiritual orientation.
In sessions, you will be given a space to safely present what you’re feeling. You will receive unconditional support, sometimes some education, and strategies you can use to work on yourself. If you’ve never sought out therapy, the therapeutic relationship in and of itself can be helpful, and promote a place for growth. There is a trust established, where this time is for you. There are answers to what you’re seeking, but we will work on the ones that work for you.
My approach is to help you develop the ability to listen to what you are saying to yourself, find out what your needs are, and help you understand where your struggle is stemming from. What you thebegin to practice, becomes your new daily life. As a result, you can become more peaceful, accepting, and trusting-- of yourself, and of others.
Uncovering patterns, and resolving feelings as related to the changes you’re going through, can also be treated by Brainspotting.
You may feel that divorce therapy can help you, but still have questions.
I’m not sure if this is something I’ll just make it through in time. I’m not sure that I need therapy.
Feelings of anger, anxiety or depression are symptoms of what you’re going through. There’s no order in which your feelings arise, and they may come back when you think they won’t. You don’t have to be in bed, neglecting all areas of your life, to deserve help making it through a rough time. Even if you feel you can manage your emotions, and they’ve not been debilitating, what you are experiencing is most likely preventing you from finding a new, happy and rewarding life. It may be difficult to reach out to others about what you’re experiencing. Others may also find it difficult to listen, or know what to say. You can become stuck in your thoughts and feelings, where it becomes harmful to you.
I think I can manage this on my own without having to spend money on therapy.
No matter what you need help working through, many don’t want to spend money if they don’t have to. Maybe you’ve already tried different things to help yourself, and are now feeling lost. Professional therapy and support can give you a new way to look at and respond to things. This will result in a better understanding of what happened, and what is now happening inside. Making an investment in your emotional health may be the best decision you make for your long-term well-being.
I’m worried that if I seek out therapy for divorce, that it may worsen my feelings because I have to focus on them.
This is a common worry. You may have heard that when you talk about a situation over and over, it “keeps it alive”. Many people I’ve seen, and people in their lives, start to notice your changes as you work through things. You may be surprised to learn that once you start listening to your thoughts, you can improve them. Many are able to start the process of becoming, or getting back to, themselves. This will then allow you to begin pursuing things you may have wanted to do, but what you’ve been struggling with has been holding you back. When you learn to listen to yourself, and are able to work through things, you may be surprised at the happiness that enters your life.
A client once thanked me for their self esteem. You may gain self esteem back that you lost in the turmoil, and end up feeling back to yourself or better. But, it’s the work we do together, both in and outside of sessions, that will help us discover what will help you get through this.
What is my next step?
When you’re ready to begin getting help for yourself, simply contact me for a free 15-minute phone consultation by clicking here to connect.
It’s time you experience all life can offer you again. I invite you to read my blog posts on the relationship with yourself, self esteem, combating depression--and how you can find hope and strength. You can get off the emotional roller coaster that can happens when we go through this type of loss.